Making tracks

...our verb "to write" originally referred to a kind of incisive track-making.


Before going to bed last night, I thought it might be helpful to write down a 'plan' for what to do if I wake in the middle of the night and can't get back to sleep, as I have been doing this past week. The reason for this is because, try as hard as I might not to, my mind is so pre-conditioned to defer to the default reaction of annoyance (why am I awake again?) or mild panic (I'm going to be exhausted tomorrow). Obviouslly, it's not helpful feeling these things at 2/3/4 am in the morning.

So this is what I wrote in my diary:

1) Do the protective shield for Andy, Lily and Maya.

This is something the hypnotherapist taught me and I do it on myself each night in bed. You imagine a line being drawn around your body of bright light or energy, then envsiage positive thoughts and positive energy from outside seeping through the line into your body. Then you imagine all negative energy trying to get through but it is unable to because there is now a strong protective shield around you and all negativity bounces back to its source.

2) Breathing deeply and remaining in the present. Each time my mind wanders to what I did today or what I'll do tomorrow, bring it back to the now.

3) This is contradictory in light of number 2, but this just came to me without thinking about it: To imagine myself as a child, walking up the hill from the house we spent alot of time at in Switzerland, along a winding mountain path to go and fill pails with fresh milk. I don't know why I thought of that; something about envisioning the action of placing one foot in front of the other, upwards and onwards I imagined to be comforting in the small hours.


Anyway, so what happened last night?

When I woke up, I spent a long time on numbers one and two and never made it to number three because by then it was starting to grow light. Which was good, because it meant that I had got through more of the night before my customary waking. And I certainly feel better today.

Writing...making tracks....moving forwards...making progress.