A bungee jump to freedom

I've decided that the analogy of a bungee jumper to describe my present existence is less prosaic than that of a yo-yo. So, rather than my days yo-yo'ing up and down, I'm suspended on a length of stretchy rope and I'm entirely at the mercy of gravitational forces. I don't know how I'll feel from one bounce to the next but all I can hope is that soon I'll come to rest and can look back on what I've experienced with more objectivity and insight.

Speaking of which, I'd like to digress a little and delve in to my memories of the single time I've bungee jumped. I was on holiday in Croatia with two friends after finishing final university exams and there was a somewhat defunct looking crane hanging over the sea advertising bungee jumps. Not letting its absence of punters deter me (this was something I had always wanted to do), I paid my money, got hooked up and up I went. As I flung myself off the edge, the thing that has stayed with me the most is not the fact that I couldn't breathe or that I was waiting to be yanked up again; it was that I could see the bottom of the ocean. The sea was crystal clear and I remember thinking this is the most amazing thing, to be able to see the ocean floor. What a privilege. Unless you're scuba diving, it's not something you'd really see, and even when you dive, you're looking forwards, not down.

I'm not trying to make any particular point here, simply bringing up a memory. But it was a wonderful experience and I shall never forget it. Writing about it now though makes me think that there's always another way to look at things and at situations we're in. Nothing's ever clear-cut and we always have a choice. A far, far wiser person than me, Desmond Tutu, writes about this compellingly:

'Development in the spiritual life, in the moral life, occurs when you have to make choices. You have a choice to follow your feelings of jealousy or hatred or to use your will to do something loving instead. Our freedom is based on our ability to rise above our feelings and to act based on our will.'

He is SO right. How can I possibly grow as a person unless I choose to rise above my feelings of anger, of resentment and frustration when I don't sleep. I need to keep focussed on this.